


Interviewing for a Ser Dad

by sassbewitchedmyass



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cute, Hella fluffy, Ser Mom and Ser Dad and their dumbass Northern Kids, hopefully funny, soft lovely Brienne is MY QUEEN, soft slightly awkward Jaime is MY FAV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-08
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-06-24 09:15:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19720690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sassbewitchedmyass/pseuds/sassbewitchedmyass
Summary: Brienne’s kids want to find their Mom the perfect man.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my Ser Family AU that I made and write for on Tumblr. It’s a modern where Brienne and Jaime basically adopt all the orphaned kids of Westeros because of course they would.  
> This story is dedicated to my tumblr followers who are amazing and wonderful and kickass and help me with my ideas and totally keep our Ser Family going. You guys are hella rad and I LOVE YOU.

Sansa: Ok, bring in the first guy.  
Arya: Can you state your name sir?  
Sandor: You know who the fuck I am!   
Pod: Not a great start.  
Arya: A great start!!  
Bran: We’ll start off by asking you a series of questions.  
Sandor: For what?  
Sansa: To see if we want you to date our mom...why else would you be here. Didn’t you see the ad in the paper?  
Sandor: Aye.  
Sansa:...  
Sandor:...  
Arya: Gendry, what did the ad say?  
Gendry: I’d just like to say sending the guy who CAN’T READ to place the ad was not very smart, was it?   
Pod: Oh gods.  
Gendry: Chill our. I just put “meet hot chick” and then our address.  
Pod: OH GODS  
Sandor: Actually the ad said “meet hot chicken”  
Pod: OHHHH GODS   
Sandor: If you’ve got chicken, I’ll stay for the questions.  
Pod: OHHHHHH GODS   
Arya: Somebody get the man some chicken!

~

Bran: Ok, now that you have your chicken, let’s dive into the questions. Each of us will ask you one question and just answer honestly.  
Sandor: Whatever.  
Pod: Do you like kids?   
Sandor: Eh.  
Pod: Eh? Is that yes or no?  
Sandor: Eh.  
Pod: *muttering and writing furiously in his notebook*  
Sansa: Where would you take our Mom on your first date? And what would you guys do?   
Sandor: Kentucky Fried Chicken.  
Sansa:...  
Sansa: Care to elaborate?   
Sandor: No.  
Arya: My turn! How do you feel about weapons? More specifically, how do you feel about weapons our Mom won’t let us use?   
Sansa: That’s not a good question!   
Arya: Shut your mouth! It’s important!   
Arya, to Sandor: Well?   
Sandor: What kind of weapons?   
Arya: A drill, a grinder, and a table saw.  
Sandor: Those aren’t weapons. Those are power tools.   
Arya: You just lost my vote, buddy.  
Bran: Do you have a life insurance policy? And if so, would you name your hypothetical kid the beneficiary?   
Sansa: Bran, you can’t ask someone about their life insurance policy! That’s rude!   
Bran: I’m not voting for a Dad unless he can make us rich when he kicks it. I’m just being practical.   
Arya: I agree. Gotta get that skrilla.  
Pod: Word.  
Sandor: what the fuck  
Gendry: Everybody shut the fuck up and let me ask my question!   
Gendry, to Sandor: This is very important. Can you read?   
Sandor: I read the fucking ad didn’t I?   
Gendry:...  
Gendry: Hmm. Good point.   
Sandor: Look, you fuckers, I don’t want to be anyone’s Dad. I just came for the chicken.   
(Brienne walks into the room)   
Brienne: Hey guys! What you doin-  
Brienne, points to Sandor: YOU!!  
Sandor: Brienne fucking Tarth   
Brienne: I’m gonna kick your ass, Clegane. Again.  
Pod: Oh no.  
Arya: We fucked up.   
Sansa: Big time.  
Bran: She’s gonna murder us.  
Gendry: Not if this fried chicken fucker murdered her first.  
All kids: GENDRY!   
Brienne and Sandor: *fighting in the family room*  
(30 minutes later)   
Brienne and Sandor: *laying on the family room floor after kicking the shit out of each other*  
Brienne: Truce?   
Sandor: Yeah, ok.  
Sandor: Your kids aren’t so bad you know. They’re just trying to find you a man.  
Brienne: THEY’RE WHAT??  
Brienne: I’m gonna kill them.  
Sandor: If you have some more chicken, I’ll help you.  
Brienne: Deal. 

~

Arya: Are you sure she won’t be home til 5?  
Sansa: Positive. I sent her shopping for Bran a birthday present. It’s gonna take her forever to find something weird enough.   
Pod: Good! Bring in the next guy!  
Sandor: I don’t know why you fuckers want me involved in this?   
Gendry: You’re her friend, ain’t ya?   
Sandor: Eh.   
Arya: You’re helping! Now, shut up and get your question ready.  
Sansa: Hello! Could you tell us your name, sir.  
Davos: Uhhh...Davos.   
Davos: Is this the right house?   
Pod: Did you come to apply to date our Mom?   
Davos:...  
Davos: No. I came to adopt the kids. Like the ad says.  
Sansa: Bran!! You were supposed to write the new ad!!   
Bran: I got busy!!   
Arya: So you sent Gendry, again?!?  
Gendry: Hey! FUCK YOU! I did the best I could.   
Pod: What did the ad say?   
Gendry: “meet 5 kids to date the mom”  
Davos: It actually said, “meet 5 moms to dopt the kids” I assumed dopt meant adopt.   
Pod: *screams*  
Sandor: You all are literally the dumbest kids alive.  
Sandor: And you’re gonna get kidnapped.   
Davos: So...um...can I still adopt you?   
Bran: No thank you.   
Arya: How would you like to help us find a dad instead?   
Davos: Yes, I would love to be you-  
Sansa: Not you.   
Davos: Oh, well...sure. I can help. Anything for the kids right?   
Sandor, to Davos: Grab some chicken and pull up a seat. We got another guy coming in 30 minutes.   
Arya: FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS BRAN, GO CHANGE THE AD 

~

Sansa: Before we begin, we’d like to confirm that you came here for a chance to date our Mom correct?  
Arya: We’ve had a few problems with our ad in the past th-  
Gendry: THAT WAS NOT MY FAULT WHATSOEVER  
Sansa: Anyways, can you confirm?  
Tormund: Yeah I saw the ad in the paper, “single, 6 foot 3, blonde goddess looking for a man to get her off”   
Gendry: WHAT THE FUCK BRAN  
Davos: That’s is so disrespectful to your mother, son!   
Bran: That’s not what I said! I swear it! I said “get her out” like get her out of the house.  
Pod: Why didn’t you just say to take her out on a date? Or have a relationship with?   
Bran: THEY CHARGE BY WORD! I was trying to make it short and sweet.   
Tormund: Who the fuck are you guys? And where’s the big woman?   
Sansa: We’re her kids.   
Arya: We’re here to interview you before you can take our Mom out.   
Davos: You can’t still interview him!   
Arya: Why not?   
Pod: Because he just wants to get her off!   
Sandor: Honestly, she could probably use it.  
All kids and Davos: SANDOR!!I  
Sandor: What? She’s wound up tighter than Pod’s panties.  
Pod: HEY!   
Tormund: So are you fuckers gonna interview me or what?   
Bran: Maybe we should give him a shot.  
Sansa:...  
Pod:...  
Gendry:...  
Arya, to Tormund: Have a seat.  
Sandor: Hold on, lemme grab some more chicken! This is gonna be good. 

~

Sansa: Ok, we’re each going to ask you a question and just answer truthfully.  
Sansa: What would you say you’re looking for in a partner?   
Tormund: A fighting spirit.  
Pod: Oh...that’s actually nice.   
Tormund: Lucious lips, come hither eyes, rough calloused hands so they can-  
Gendry: THATS ENOUGH  
Pod: Ok...not so nice.  
Arya: If your partner’s child wanted to start a rebellion, ya know hypothetically. How would you feel about that?  
Tormund: FUCK YEAH! SIGN ME UP!   
Arya, smiling and putting a check mark in her notebook: Hmmhmmm  
Bran: Do you have a life insurance policy and if so-  
Sansa: BRAN!   
Sandor: Cut the shit and get to the juicy questions.  
Arya: Like what?  
Sandor: Like how big is your co-  
Pod: SANDOR!  
Sandor: And do you know how to use it?   
Gendry: I’m gonna puke.  
Bran: That’s our MOM, dude   
Pod: Where would you take our Mom on your first date?   
Tormund: I’d take her to the aquarium.   
Davos: Awww  
Tormund: And show her all the seals.  
Sansa and Pod: Awww  
Tormund: Show her how wet and slick they are. Just like she’s gonna be for me when I-  
Gendry: OHMYGODS  
Bran: Stop talking! Stop talking!   
(Jon walks in)  
Jon: Hey guys!   
Jon: *sees Sandor, Davos, and Tormund* Uhhh...what the hells is going on?   
Tormund: Can I switch?  
Arya: Switch?   
Tormund: *points to Jon* I don’t want the Mom, I want this one.  
(Someone knocks on the door and Gendry goes to answer it)   
Gendry: *opens the door* What are you doing here?   
Stranger: I came for the interview.  
Gendry: What?   
Stranger: The ads remember?   
(Gendry and the stranger walk back into the room)   
Arya: Who’s this guy?   
Gendry: This is the guy from the newspaper. He’s here for the interview.  
Gendry: *glares* He fucked up all our ads.  
Sansa: What’s your name?   
Jaime: I’m Jaime Lannister.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where it all began.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote all this at like 2 in the morning in a ridiculous fit of inspiration and then had to go back and change SOOO much because it made no sense😂 Hope it makes better sense now and I hope you all enjoy it!

The first time the boy showed up in his office Jaime thought it was a joke. He wanted to place an ad in the paper to get his mom a date. How pathetic. She must be duller than dirt if she had to have her son place an ad just for a date. And what kind of woman sent her child on this kind of errand? A crazy person. He didn’t want to put that burden on any unsuspecting man. So, when the boy told him to write “meet hot chick” he had changed it just slightly to “meet hot chicken”. By the second time the boy was in his office, Jaime realized the poor mother had no idea the ad was being placed. So, he decided to mess with the kid a bit and change “meet 5 kids to date their mom” into “meet 5 moms to dopt their kids”. He was hoping anyone who saw it would rightly think that “dopt” was just a typo for adopt. He was going to teach this kid a lesson. By the third time the boy had come back, wheeling in a second boy with a third on his heels, Jaime was through. 

“Ad not doing so well?”

“Somehow they keep getting screwed up so we’ve come to place another. Our last one we hope.”

“I’m assuming your mother doesn’t know about this?”

All three boys silently stared at him with wide, guilty eyes. 

“I’m also going to assume she would be livid if she did,” Jaime said, rubbing his temples to try and stave off a migraine. This was the third time this week someone from this family had been in his office. Their poor mother. 

“So why are you doing it? Is it a prank on her? I’ve done my share of pranks but this one just seems cruel. Has she done something to deserve your cruelty?”

“NO!” The shortest boy blurted. 

“She’s the best mother.” The tall boy said quietly, looking to the ground. 

The boy in the wheelchair wheeled himself a little closer to Jaime’s desk and murmured,  
“She’s not our biological mom, ok? And she took in five kids when she didn’t have to. We know she loves us and she’s happy with our family. It’s just...she’s lonely.”  
The tall boy stepped forward and raised his gaze to Jaime.”We’re placing the ads because we want to interview any potential guy. We need to know that he’s good enough for her before we let him meet her.”   
The shorter boy nodded and said, “All she ever does is take care of everyone else and she deserves someone who wants to take care of her.”

Jaime felt a tug in his chest. These boys truly did care a great deal for their mother. What would a woman like that be like? Who loved unconditionally and inspired that same love in her kids. He had to say he was a little more than intrigued by this point. “Alright, what’s the final message?” 

The boys began to whisper fervently amongst themselves. Finally the boy in the wheelchair blew out a breath and looked to Jaime. “Ok, we’d like to say, ‘single, 6 foot 3 blonde goddess looking for a man to get her out.’” 

“Get her out?”

“Yeah, like get her out of the house.”

“Right...”

As he began to write the message down he had a fleeting thought that the description sounded like his Brinny girl. She was tall and blonde and most certainly a goddess. But it couldn’t be, surely. Then again...”There’s no way she looks this good,” he casually murmured. He didn’t want the boys to know he was digging.   
The shorter boy’s face began to turn red with anger. Before he could blow his gasket and clock Jaime in the nose he quickly said, “Do you have a picture?”   
Tall boy pulled out his phone and swiped through his pictures stopping at one and handing the phone to Jaime. 

It was her. He couldn’t believe it. She was sitting on a porch swing with a red headed girl and a little brunette on either side of her. Her eyes, those gorgeous blue eyes, were squeezed closed and her head thrown back in a laugh. He’d never seen his Brinny girl laugh. Gods, it was a breathtaking sight. It looked boisterous and joyful and he ached to be able to hear it, to be the cause of it. 

“Uhhh, dude. Can I have my phone back?” 

“Oh, yeah sorry.”

“So were good with the ad?”

“Yeah, sure.”

The boys all nodded and then turned to head out the door, but Jaime couldn’t let them leave just yet. 

“Wait!”

They all three turned around to stare at him.  
What the fuck was he supposed to say? I’m in love with your mother? Don’t interview anyone else? Interview me! How was he going to explain to these kids that he’d fallen in love with their mom without ever having talked to her. The best thing he could hope for was to keep fucking up the ads until he was able to meet the kids at her house for an interview. 

“Dude? Say something.”

“Uhhh...good luck. With the ad.”

The boy in the wheelchair stared at him intently for a moment and then muttered a quiet “thanks”. Once the boys were gone Jaime fell back in his chair. He rubbed his eyes and took a shuddering breath. His Brinny had kids. He shouldn’t be surprised. She always looked so fondly at mothers and their children on the train. It was one of the things he found so endearing about her. One of the many. 

He’d first noticed her three months ago. She was sitting across from him on the train and when he felt eyes on him he’d looked up from his phone and he was met with her clear, guileless gaze. She quickly looked away and never returned her eyes to him for the rest of the ride, but that was alright because he used her avoidance to study her. She wasn’t pretty, not conventionally anyway. She had freckles over nearly every inch of her face. Her lips were just a touch too wide and her nose was crooked like it had been broken a few times, but she had a certain grace about her, a quiet sort of confidence...and those sapphire eyes. He’d only seen them for a space of a few seconds but that’s all it took for him to want to drown in them everyday, or to at least be able to decipher the emotions behind them.

She got off at the 7th street station and he resigned himself to the fact that he’d probably never see her again. So, he was surprised, pleasantly so, when she was back on his same train the next day. She sat opposite him again but a couple seats down this time. Was she avoiding him? Or did she not notice he was there? Surely, if she was interested in him she would have noticed. Most women who chased after him would be practically sitting in his lap by now, but once again, she didn’t look at him the whole time. He knew this for sure because he stared at her for the entire half hour ride. She was reading a book, and every now and then, she would squint her eyes and mouth a few words. Then, she’d furrow her brow and finally her lips would lift just the tiniest bit into a small smile. Jaime was fascinated. 

He watched her everyday. He didn’t want to seem like a creep and if she’d ever told him to fuck off he would have, but she surprisingly never had. Some days, if he was lucky, he would catch her eye. He’d always give her a slight nod and wiggle his fingers in a little wave. Some days he’d even give her a smile, his best one, he thought; friendly and open and blinding. The first time he’d done it she had seemed taken aback, like she’d never had someone smile at her before. A flush rose from her collarbone to her hairline; painting her skin a splotchy red pattern. It was still there when she had exited the train. The second time, she gave him a long searching look but she didn’t startle like she had the first time and she didn’t look away. The blush came back though, which he found utterly charming. The third time, she gave him a little upturn of her lips; her eyes crinkling at the corners and her nose scrunched just the tiniest bit. And that had been the beginning of everything. 

They had never spoken. Not once in three months had he ever heard her voice, but they shared stolen glances and soft smiles, and every once in a while, a meaningful look. He wasn’t completely sure what the meaning actually was, but to Jaime it felt like falling in love. He had never been in love but surely this warming in his chest, this frantic beat of his heart, had to be something like it. 

One day into the fourth week he noticed her name tag. He’d never seen it before, but today had been a particularly hot one and she wasn’t wearing a coat. He couldn’t read the small lettering at the top but he could make out the name just fine. Brinny. His train love was named Brinny. He was rather in love with that too. 

He knew if he’d ever told anyone, they’d think he was completely mad. You can’t fall in love with some woman you’d never even spoken to...but he had. There were some things you could conclude without words. He didn’t have to speak to her to know her, and Jaime knew the woman his Brinny was. 

He had seen her kindness when she had given up her seat to a boy who’d walked onto the train on crutches. He’d seen her generous nature when she dropped money into the cup of the homeless man who sat on the bench at the 7th street station. Every single day he’d watch her through the windows as the train was pulling away and every single day she’d stop, and smiling her sweet soft smile, she’d murmur a few words to him and drop some money into his cup. He’d seen her  
protectiveness when she’d stood in front of that same homeless man and defended him against taunts from three insolent teenagers. He’d seen her soft heart when silent tears began to slowly slide down her cheeks as she was reading. She clutched the book to her chest and leaned her head back against the window, closing her eyes. After a few moments she opened those glorious eyes, still brimming with tears, and took a couple deep breaths. She tugged the book a little closer to her heart for a beat and then opened it once more to continue reading. Jaime was enthralled. 

They may have never spoken a single sentence to each other, but he did know her. From her soft smile to the freckles dashed across her pale cheeks to the flush of that elegant neck to her deliciously long legs, he knew her. 

And now he knew her kids were trying to set her up, and he’d been cocking it up on purpose. He should feel bad about that but he simply couldn’t. He wanted a chance with her, however small that chance may be. In three months she’d never pursued him. Although, to be fair, he’d never pursued her either. To be completely honest, he wasn’t sure how. He had no idea how to approach a woman like her. She seemed so reserved, even a bit awkward at times, and he didn’t want to fuck it up and possibly embarrass her. Hells, he didn’t want to embarrass himself. People assumed because of his looks that he was this smooth charmer, but quite frankly he could be as awkward at times as her, likely more so. Now, the perfect chance had fallen into his lap and he wasn’t going to miss it. She may reject him, hells her kids may reject him before she could, but he had to try. He was tired of just admiring her from afar. He longed to hear her voice, to see those eyes up close, to make her laugh uproariously like the picture on her son’s phone. 

Jaime stood from his chair and stretched, his mind made up. He’d go for the ridiculous interview as soon as he was able. He’d still have to run the stupid ad, the kids had paid for it after all, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t do a little sabotage on this one too. 

Jaime wasn’t able to make it to Brinny’s house until the next evening. He was more nervous than he’d ever been in his life, and pulling up to the curb and seeing four other cars in the drive didn’t make it any better. He took a calming breath, wiping his sweaty hand on his jeans, and stepped out of the car. After knocking on the front door he almost turned around and ran back to his car. He should have just asked her out on the train. Would she be angry with him for going behind her back and ‘interviewing’ with her kids for the chance to be her boyfriend? Possibly. Most likely. But he wanted her kids to like him; approve of him. He didn’t have a chance for anymore second thoughts because the knob was turning. The door swung open and the tall boy looked surprised and then confused. 

“What are you doing here?”

“I’m here for the interview.”

“What?”

“The ads, remember?”

After a moment he stepped aside so Jaime could walk in. At least he’d made it past the door, he thought. The boy led him to a dining room where four kids and four grown men were sat around a rectangular table scattered with notebooks and...fried chicken? The little brunette he’d seen from the picture immediately locked eyes on him. She gave him a once over and then turned to the tall boy. 

“Who’s this guy?”

“This is the guy from the newspaper. He’s here for the interview.” Tall boy looked away from the brunette to glare at Jaime and gritted out, “He fucked up all our ads.”

Jaime had the grace to blush a bit at that. If they knew he’d intentionally screwed up their ads, he was already off to a bad start. The red head cocked her head to the side and gestured for him to take a seat.

“What’s your name.”

“I’m Jaime Lannister.”

She nodded to him and jotted it down in her notebook. At least the kids seemed to be taking this seriously. That made him breathe a little easier. He didn’t want to come here just to be made fun of, but he would have. For Brinny. 

Jaime looked around the table then. The four men were all staring at him; all with varying emotions crossing their faces. He saw bemusement, concern, indifference and pity. Were these his competitors? The ginger was quite handsome but he seemed to only have eyes for the curly haired brunette. The brunette seemed a bit young for Brinny and the balding man a bit old. The hulking bearded man looked like he didn’t give a fuck about anything but the chicken leg in his hand. Jaime thought his chances against him might be pretty good. The red head tapped the table to get his attention. He startled and could feel the flush climbing to his cheeks. 

“I’m sorry. What did you say?”

“I said we’re going to start by having you answer a few questions from each of us, okay?”

“Alright.”

“I’m Sansa, by the way, and these are my siblings: Jon, Arya, Bran, Pod, and Gendry” She said and pointed to each sibling in turn. She pointed towards the end of the table and told him, “This is Sandor and Davos. They’re...friends of our mother.”

Jaime nodded and tilted his head towards the ginger. “And him?”

The ginger laughed a booming laugh and said, “Just here for the show.”

Well, that didn’t seem promising. 

The redhead rolled her eyes at that and gave Jaime an encouraging smile. “Let’s get to the questions shall we? Podrick?”  
Podrick cleared his throat and read from his notebook, “What qualities do you look for in a partner?”  
Jaime smiled to himself. This was an easy one. Wait, was it cheating to not tell them he knew her? Would that make his chances worse or better? Although, technically hed never met her, not formally anyway.   
“Uhhh, sir?”  
“I’m sorry I was just- thinking.” He was blushing again. Godsdammit.

“I look for someone kind. Someone who cares about others, even strangers on the street. There’s a certain beauty about someone who’s kind without ever expecting anything in return.”

Podrick was looking down at his notebook and nodding with a slight smile.   
“What a load of shite. I think I’m gonna puke.” Sandor muttered. Podrick looked like someone had kicked his puppy. “Shut up! It was beautiful!”  
“My turn!” Arya fairly bounced with excitement.  
“Oh gods.” Sansa muttered.  
Arya leaned her elbows on the table and fixed him with an unnervingly intense stare. “If one of your partner’s kids accidentally started a riot- hypothetically, of course- how would you handle that?”

Jaime laughed out loud at the ridiculousness of the question but sobered quickly when he saw Arya’s face. She was dead serious. 

“I- I wouldn’t handle it.”

“What?”

“If you mean how would I discipline them? I wouldn’t. Whatever your mother says, goes. I would never presume to step in unless she asked for my advice.”

Arya stared at him open mouthed for a second and then gave him an approving nod and turned to Bran. “Your turn.” Bran met Jaime’s gaze and took a fortifying breath before blurting, “Doyouhavealifeinsurancepolicyandifso-“

“BRAN! FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS QUIT ASKING ABOUT THEIR FINANCES!” Sansa reprimanded. 

“Did you think you could get the question out if you were speed talking? We all knew it was coming, dude.” Gendry laughed. 

“Well, if you’d just let me ask the freaking que-“

“It’s Sansa’s turn,” Pod interrupted. 

Sansa looked down at her notebook and then smiled at Jaime. “Where would you take our Mom on your first date?”

Hmmm. Where would he take her? He could do a traditional dinner and a movie, but that didn’t really seem to fit his Brinny. He would want to wow her. Well, maybe not wow her. She didn’t seem like the type of woman who cared much about extravagant dates or expensive gifts. She would want to experience something lovely. She’d want to feel something in that soft heart of hers. It hit him then. He knew exactly where he’d take her.

“I’d take her to a book store.”

Sansa looked surprised at that. She furrowed her brow and leaned closer to him “Care to elaborate.”

“She could show me her favorite authors and her favorite novels. You can tell so much about someone by what they read, can’t you? What characters resonate with them. What passages catch their attention and never let go. What books burrow themselves into their hearts and never leave.” He sighed a wistful sound and smiled fondly thinking of Brinny clutching that book to her chest, a soft smile settling on her lips. “I’d want to get to know her through the stories she holds close to her chest. I’d want to fall in love with her through the words she’s fallen in love with.”

Jaime finally looked up when he realized no one was saying anything. No insults from Sandor or soft exclamations from Podrick. Every set of eyes at the table were trained on him and every mouth was slightly agape. 

Oh shit. Had he said something wrong? He’d just spoken from his heart, that soft place in his soul where memories of Brinny resided. He began to panic. Maybe he’d revealed too much of himself. Maybe his answer had been to cheesy and now they were going to laugh him out of the house before he ever got a chance to take her to that bookstore. 

“It’s just- she loves books and if you’ve ever seen her read one you’d want to ask her a million questions about what exactly it’s making her feel and-“

“Wait a minute,” Sansa said softly, interrupting his rambling. 

She stood up from her chair; her hands flat on the table and leaned toward him, narrowing her eyes. “How do you know she loves to read?”

Oh no. Oh no no no no. 

He was saved from answering by the sound of the front door closing.   
“Uh oh.” Podrick said quietly.   
“You’re all so fucked.” Sandor laughed.  
“You’re here too, asshole! Don’t think you aren’t fucked along with us.” Gendry muttered.   
Arya caught Jaime’s eye and quirked her lips. “The last time she found us interviewing a potential date; she kicked his ass.”  
Jaime saw Sandor rear back at that as if he’d been slapped. “She did NOT kick my ass!”

All the kids and the Davos were looking around frantically as if searching for a place to hide. There wasn’t enough time for that, Jaime thought. They were all well and truly fucked, including him, apparently. 

He could hear footsteps coming down the hallway and then she spoke. Her voice was soft and lilting, with a touch of huskiness, and better than any sound he could have ever dreamed. 

“Why are there so many cars in the driveway- oh!” Jaime heard her come to the doorway and stop. He rose quickly from his chair and turned around to face her. Magnificent cerulean eyes met his. She stumbled a couple steps backwards and reached out a hand to clutch the doorframe. 

“You.” She whispered.

“Me.” He murmured.

She opened and closed her mouth a few times. Trying to find her words and failing. She looked to the others in the room and then brought those perplexed eyes back to rest on him. A million emotions seemed to flit across her face in the span of a few minutes. Jaime couldn’t interpret them all but he definitely saw disbelief and confusion. He released a relieved breath when her face settled into soft, tender lines. She looked down to her hands she’d clutched together in front of her for a moment and then glanced back up at him, her eyes shining with...yearning? 

“I- what are you doing here?”

Jaime looked to the assembled madness behind him. They all loved her dearly, and he knew they meant well, but he didn’t want her to be hurt again by their actions. No matter how well intentioned they were. He turned back to meet her eyes and smiled gently. 

“I came to finally ask you out on a date but you weren’t home yet. Your children allowed me to stay and wait.”

Jaime could have sworn he heard a collective exhale behind him. 

Brinny remained silent. She was back to staring at her hands. She was clutching and releasing them in rhythm to her shallow breaths. He took as step toward her and spoke softly, “I know we’ve never spoken, Brinny, but I-“

She finally looked up with a bewildered expression. “Brinny?”

Jaime was confused. “Yes. Isn’t that your name? It’s the name on your name tag. I thought-“

“Brienne.” She murmured.

“I’m sorry?”

“My name. It’s Brienne.” She gave a little laugh, “The museum misspelled it on my name tag and I- well, I was too embarrassed to ask them to change it.” 

“Brienne.” He tried it out. It was a beautiful name. He let it reverberate around his mind, Brienne Brienne Brienne, and then roll off his tongue once more, “Brienne. It’s a lovely name. It fits you.”

She was blushing now. The heat rising from her chest to her hairline. He hadn’t realized how much he’d missed that sweet flush. 

“You could- you could call me Brinny. If you want to, that is.”

“I’ll call you whatever you want me to. Whatever you prefer-“

“Oh for fuck’s sake! Kiss her or get the hell outta here, pretty boy! We got chicken to eat!” Sandor muttered. 

Jaime was the one blushing now. Brienne’s eyes widened and the slight pink of her cheeks deepened to a furious shade of red. She shot a glare over his shoulder. Jaime stepped closer and held out his hand to her. 

“I’m Jaime Lannister and I’d like to take you on a date.”

“Brienne Tarth,” she smiled, taking his hand and gently shaking it. 

“It’s nice to officially meet you and in the spirit of full disclosure,” he leaned a touch closer to her, wanting to make sure she heard his next words clearly, “I’m going to marry you one day.”

She gave that loud vibrant laugh he’d longed to hear since the minute he’d seen that picture. She shook his hand gently once more and leaned closer. She was close enough that he could see every fleck of blue that surrounded her iris. More brilliant than any sapphire he’d ever seen, lighter than a summer eve sky, clearer than the waters off the coast. Her eyes were still alight with laughter when she murmured, “Lets start with the date first, pretty boy.” 

The room behind them erupted into cheers.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I hadn’t intended to add another chapter to this story but this came to me and I just had to write it. It’s S M U T T Y y’all. My first ever smut so please be gentle with me.

Five years later...

The moment he saw her at the other side of the bar he had walked away from his brother without a word. It had been five years since he’d seen her, but she was still just as lovely as ever. Those same luminous eyes that had drawn him in from the first, were staring at him intently as he made his way down the bar to her. Her hair was a little longer and she seemed to have a bit of a fuller figure. Did she have babies now? He couldn’t stomach the thought of another man having his hands on her, even after all these years. 

When he finally reached her, he took her hand, placing a soft kiss on her knuckles and murmured, “Hello, Brienne.”  
Even in the dim light of the bar he could see the flush crawling from her chest to her hairline. Some things never changed.   
“Hello, Jaime.”  
He gave her a once over and smiled. Damn she looked good.  
“You look well.”  
“Thank you. You-you do too.”

He couldn’t stand this awkwardness, this tension. He’d been her lover once hadn’t he? There was no need for her to be shy with him now. He grabbed her by the nape of her neck and pulled her closer to him, their lips almost touching. 

“I’ve missed you, Brinny.”

“Jaime-“ She tried to weakly protest but he wouldn’t let her.

“I know you’ve missed me too. Want me too. I can see it in your eyes, Brienne. You never could lie to me with those eyes.”

She gave a shuddering breath and rested her forehead against his lips. 

“I have missed you,” she whispered. “And I do want you. Gods, do I want you. But Jaime-“

“No buts,” he growled. 

He pulled away from her and grasping her chin, he peered into those sapphire eyes. 

“You want me?” 

She nodded.

He tugged her closer to him and touched his lips lightly to hers. Her lush lips, her lavender perfume, her soft skin under his fingertips; with that brief contact, every memory he had of her rushed through his mind like a dam breaking. 

Brienne’s eyes shining in the glow from the porch light as she shyly kissed him for the first time after their first date. Her soft breaths and flushed cheeks as she lay curled up halfway on his lap on her couch. She’d fallen asleep fifteen minutes into the movie and he just couldn’t wake her. So, he wrapped his arms around her, holding her against his chest and watched her sleep until the movie had ended. Her silent tears and shaky breaths as she told him about losing her best friend Catelyn, and then taking in her children as her own. Brienne laughing in the kitchen as the noonday sun poured through the French doors and covered her in light. Brienne sprawled across her bed, still panting, with sweat cooling on her body, the first time they’d made love. Brienne perched on her bathroom counter, thighs spread wide and gripping his hair, as he kneeled in front of her and worshipped at the alter of her cunt. 

He needed her. Now. 

He grabbed her wrist in a vice like grip and growled into her ear, “Come with me.”

Three minutes later he was slamming the door to the small bar bathroom closed and pushing her up against it. He ran his hand down her body from breast to thigh and took her lips in a searing kiss. He’d missed her so much. So damn much. Pushing her harder back against the door, he pressed his thigh between her legs and Brienne instinctively began rolling her hips against him. She ran her hand up to the nape of his neck, pulling him harder against her mouth as she devoured him. She must have missed him too. 

He pulled back from her to drag his lips down her neck to her collarbone. He flicked his tongue out to dip into the hollow there and then bit down on her shoulder gently. She moaned low in the back of her throat and slid her hand down his chest until it rested on his cock. He took a gasping breath and placed his hands on her hips, leaning back to look into her eyes. 

“You want this?”

She bit her swollen bottom lip. “Yes.”

“You want me.”

She was quiet for a moment, staring at him intently and then she nodded. “Yes.”

“Good.”

He gripped her hips and pulled her down tighter onto his thigh. Pushing her hips back and forth to give her clit the friction she needed. Brienne bit down on his earlobe and squeezed his cock. He was going to come before he ever got inside of her. 

“You’re so tall in those damn heels,” he grunted, thrusting himself into her hand. 

“I’m not apologizing for it.”

“It wasn’t a criticism, love.” 

“Don’t call me love.”

“What should I call you?”

“Brienne.”

“No, that won’t do.”

He’d released her hip and was inching his hand up her skirt, drawing slow circles on her upper thighs. He kissed her collarbone and said, “I don’t want to call you Brienne.”

“Why?” She rasped against his temple, her fingers dragging through his hair in rough tugs.

“Because I never do.”

“You don’t even know me anymore. How could you say you never call me Brienne? You don’t call me anything.”

“I know you,” He gritted out, nudging her dress strap down her shoulder with his nose and following the path with his lips.  
“That was years ago,” she said breathlessly.   
“Hmmmm.”  
That was as much of an answer as he could give her at the moment. His fingers were almost exactly where he wanted them to be the moment he saw her in the bar. He could feel the heat rolling off her body already. He knew when he slid her panties to the side and finally touched her, she’d be soaked for him.   
Brienne had always been so responsive. Years ago, all he would have to do was give her a look across the dinner table, and five minutes later they’d be fucking up against the wall in her bedroom.

He’d been so lost in his thoughts he hadn’t realized Brienne had gone completely still. Her hands were gripping his shoulders now, but the rest of her body was motionless. He realized he was already stroking through her wetness. His body acting on pure instinct. The drive to give her pleasure was so elemental to him; he hadn’t even noticed he was doing it. She used to love this, so why wasn’t she reacting? Was he losing his touch? She always- wait a minute...

“You’re not wearing panties.”

She smirked and clutched his shoulders harder, rolling her hips towards his fingers, silently begging him to move them. 

“I was waiting for you to notice.”

“I was preoccupied.”

She reared back at that, “preoccupied?”

He kissed her naked shoulder and drug his lips across her chest to the other shoulder, sliding that dress strap down with his teeth; his fingers still stroking lazily through her damp curls. 

“Yes. Do you remember when we first started dating?”

“Yes,” she sighed.

He was kissing the top of her breast now, working his way down to that dusky nipple that he knew would be hard for him. 

“I was remembering how we fucked against every wall and every piece of furniture in that house.”

“I don’t live in that house anymore.” 

He slid a finger inside her and ran his tongue over her nipple. She arched against him, slamming her head back against the door.

“Why not?”

“Jaime,” she pleaded. 

She was slick and hot and ready. He knew her body well. All it would take would be a few strokes with his thumb over her swollen clit and she would detonate, but Jaime wanted his answers first. 

“Why don’t you live in that house anymore, Brienne?” 

She was rocking her hips against him, trying to get the friction she needed, but he pulled his hand back slightly so she couldn’t make contact. 

“Tell me.”

“My husband,” she cried. “My husband and I moved after we got married. He thought we needed a bigger house.” 

He pulled away from her breast so he could look into her eyes. Her cheeks were flushed and her sapphire eyes were wide and glistening. He could see the frustrated tears gathering in the corners.

“Your husband?” He whispered. 

She looked down, running her hands across his chest and bringing them to rest on the waistband of his jeans. She finally brought her gaze back to him, running her tongue across her bottom lip and then biting it. She nodded. 

“Say it, Brienne.”

She shook her head.

He slid another finger inside her and rested his thumb over her clit.   
“If you want this,” he curled his fingers inside her and she sucked in a breath. “Then, you’ll say it.”  
She laid her head against the door and started circling her hips frantically. Didn’t she know that wouldn’t work with him?

He pulled his body back enough to lay his forearm across her belly, pushing her back against the door. He placed a soft kiss in the middle of her chest and whispered against her skin, “Say it, Brienne.” 

She remained silent.

He curled his fingers inside her once more and bit down on her nipple. Hard. 

“Do you want to come?” He gritted out against her nipple, his thumb making two quick circles on her clit. 

“My husband,” she whispered. 

“Your what?”

She fisted her hand in his hair and jerked his head back so she could meet his eyes. Those astonishing eyes he’d fallen in love with so many years ago were shining with love. So much love. She pulled him close and whispered against his lips, “My husband.”   
She drug her lips across his cheek to his ear and whispered again, “My husband.” Jaime trembled. 

His cock was so hard he was afraid he’d have a permanent imprint on it from his zipper. It had been five years and still, every time, every damn time he heard that word from her lips; he went harder than granite. 

“Again,” he rasped. 

“My husband.”

“Again.”

“Jaime. My love. My husband.”

“Brienne,” he whispered against her cheek. He was the one pleading now.

She gripped his hair tight and tilted his head back, tracing a path from his ear to his collarbone and back again with her lips.

“Fuck me, Jaime.”

Within seconds he was inside her. Home. It felt like coming home every time. He had intended to tease and play and twist her up in knots, but he couldn’t slow his wild thrusts now for all the gold in the Iron Bank. 

Brienne had her eyes closed and her head tilted back against the door, arching her back and rolling her hips into his with every thrust.   
He wrapped one arm around her hips and grabbed her thigh with his other hand to bring her leg up and around his waist for a better angle. He hit that spot and she blew out a harsh breath and gripped his ass, pulling him into her faster and harder. He let go of her thigh to wrap his fingers around her throat with the faintest pressure. “Look at me,” he murmured. 

She opened those magnificent eyes and focused on him. It was like a punch to the gut every time he saw her like this; with her hair mussed and her cheeks flushed with passion. She was so godsdamned beautiful, and he thanked whatever fucking higher power was out there that he was the man who got to see her like this. To touch her silken skin, to hold her as she came apart in his arms. 

He kept his eyes locked on hers and pushed onto his tip toes to thrust deeper. She sucked in a sharp breath and her eyes began to fall closed.

“No,” he squeezed her neck gently. “Show me those eyes, Brienne. I need them.” 

She opened them once more and he could have cried at the tenderness he saw there. She was never very good at their games. Although, to be fair, neither was he. Hard as she tried, she never could quite hide the emotions in her eyes. She couldn’t be the ex-lover he fucked in the bar bathroom when every glance of those eyes said, “I love you. I love you. I love you.”

He could feel her tightening around his cock. She was so close. He moved his hand around to the nape of her neck and pulled her closer, his lips brushing against hers as he growled, “Come for me, love. Now.”

And like always, her body obeyed. 

Brienne gave a guttural moan and her body went bow tight. He moved his hand down to grip her hip and pulled her harder onto him as he continued thrusting. Then, he kissed her, rough and wild, to hide the roar building in his throat as he spilled into her. 

“That’s been the best yet,” he panted against her chest. He could feel her nodding her head, but bastard that he was, he wanted some verbal confirmation from his Brinny that she was pleased. Extremely pleased. He grabbed a fistful of her hair and gently pulled her head back so he could see her eyes.

“Wouldn’t you agree?”

She gave him that slow, sexy smile he loved so much; lifting her lips and tilting up the corners of her eyes. She blinked slowly as if she was trying to focus in her sex drunk haze. 

“You’ll get no arguments from me, sir.”

He released her hair and slowly pulled out of her, dragging a hiss from Brienne’s lips. He flipped her dress back down and smoothed his hand over her hip. She slumped against him and rasped against his neck, “I can’t seem to move.”

“Then I’ve done my job well.”

She kicked out a heel and caught him in the shin. 

“Dammit Brienne!”

“You don’t have to sound so cocky.”

“Oh, but I do,” he said, giving her a sharp slap on her ass. 

She lifted her head and looked at him through heavy lidded eyes. “Tyrion’s going to wonder where you are.”  
He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and kissed her nose. “He knew where I would be the moment we saw you at the other end of the bar.”  
He probably shouldn’t tell her this, but he loved to see those embarrassed blushes. 

“He’s the one who gave me this idea.”

She slapped him on the shoulder and groaned, “I’m gonna kill you...and I’ll have to kill him too.”

“He said next time we should ‘meet’ in a department store.”

“I am not fucking you in a Target bathroom.”

“Come on, Brienne, I see the lust in your eyes every time we step through the doors of that store.”

“Jaime-“

Just then her phone rang. She looked at the screen and rolled her eyes. He began to straighten his clothes and hers as he listened to the one sided conversation. 

“Hello?”  
“Yeah, I’m about to head home.”  
“He did what?”  
“Well, is he bleeding?”  
“Blistered?”  
“Ok, well, put an ice pack on it and I’ll be home in a half an hour.”  
“Love you too. Bye.”

Jaime grabbed her wrist and pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her and hugging her to him tightly. 

“Which one?”

“Podrick.”

“What’d he do?”

“Thought he could make stir fry and ended up burning his eyebrows off.”

Jaime knew he should be a little more concerned for his son, but picturing Podrick with no eyebrows had him laughing so hard tears were streaming down his face. Brienne was laughing too. He could feel her body shaking against his and that vibrant laugh was echoing off the walls of the tiny bathroom. She finally pulled away from him and gave him one last lingering kiss. 

“I’ll see you when you get home?” She asked.

“Will you have panties on?”

She looked at him with mock sternness. “Only bar Brienne goes pantyless!”

She turned quickly and grabbed the doorknob but before she could open it, he stepped up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He rested his face against the nape of her neck and breathed her in. Brienne sighed a soft sound and melted into him. He kissed her nape and whispered against her sweat dampened skin, “I love you, Brienne.”

She grabbed his forearms and squeezed. “I love you too, Jaime. So very much.”

He kissed her nape once more and released her with a little pat on her ass. She opened the door and looked back over her shoulder at him with a soft smile. 

“It was good to see you again.”

“You too, Brinny. Don’t be a stranger.”

He could hear her glorious laughter echoing down the hallway as she walked away.


End file.
